After last week's break, I'm joining again with Marla for the Radical Read-along. This week we're focussing on chapter 6 "How much is enough?: American wealth and a world of poverty".
Once again, this week's chapter has left me unsure of how to respond. This isn't that I'm being convicted, but because we've already chosen to live a life of sacrifice. Where do I go from there? How much is enough?
Recently, I learned that I am in the top 1% of the wealthiest people in the world. Granted, my wealth doesn't look like much compared to the great wealth of others, but this statistic shook me. In my nation, I live just a short step above the poverty line. It wasn't that many years ago that we were below the poverty line, which is also where I grew up. If my poverty is in fact riches, what then does the rest of the world look like?
Around the same time, I was spending a lot of time reading James. The fifth chapter of James in particular speaks quite harshly to the rich. Verse four jumped out at me:
For listen! Hear the cries of the field workers whom you have cheated of their pay. The wages you held back cry out against you. The cries of those who harvest your fields have reached the ears of the Lord of Heaven's Armies." (James 5:4 NLT)
One of the reasons I enjoy such a nice lifestyle is that many of my luxuries, including food, are purchased at unreasonably low prices. Many farmers are not paid fair wages. To keep our food cosmetically appealing as well as hardy, many chemicals are applied to this food. Pesticides and the like didn't used to bother me. Until I learned about the appallingly high rate of cancer and other diseases among farmers that use pesticides. My new knowledge combined with this scripture to make a life change.
Over the last couple of growing seasons, my family has been dabbling in eating local and organic. We've joined a CSA as well as local foods buying club. Although this food tastes a lot better, it's still very expensive and we're still relatively poor. Even though I knew I could purchase local organic flour, I chose to buy the much less expensive grocery store flour. My heart was leaning towards local foods, but I was determined to be a responsible shopper. Until I read this verse. I was convicted.
I was part of the problem. I had alternatives, I knew better, but still thought that this was all about me. I didn't like this new revelation. I felt convicted to spend the extra money on local flour and meat, but didn't want to obey. What would my husband say? What about our very tight food budget? I decided to be cute and asked God to raise our support. Instead we lost a supporter. What was God trying to say?
I soon decided that God didn't want my maybes. He didn't want my "if we can afford it"s. He wanted my obedience. I bought the expensive flour. I bought the pricey local hormone, drug-free meat from a farmer who needs the income. I bought local produce at fair prices, not cheap ones. I have a long way to go on that one, but it's fun insisting on paying extra because I know their goods are worth more. We sacrificed. We eat less meat and are working on making what meat we eat go a lot further. We've drastically cut back on our purchase of junk food and other prepared or packaged foods.
This isn't a final solution. We've identified one area that needs work and are steadily working on eating in a much healthier, sustainable, responsible manner. But there are still a lot of people who need food, shelter, medicine and Jesus. I don't know where God is going to lead us next or where other blindspots are in my faith-walk. But whatever the cost, wherever the call, I really really really want to obey God and live a life of sacrifice not indulgence.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Monday, October 18, 2010
Friendship
This post has been on my heart for quite awhile. This morning while I was mulling over it once again, the phrase "friends don't let friends...." popped into my head. Later I logged onto Facebook to find that a friend had posted an article on the sale of personal information by third party applications. My friend then commented "Friends don't let friends use Facebook/Farmville". I found that amusing and somewhat eerily appropriate.
Our culture perceives friends to be supportive, encouraging individuals, ones that can speak into our lives. In Proverbs it says that as iron sharpens iron, so friends sharpen friends. Friends are not just those people that we have a great time with, but also those that challenge us to be better people. They can be the ones that warn us of potential danger resulting from our decisions. And they can also be the people who love us as God does, unconditionally.
However, in the last several years I've noticed a pattern emerge. Perhaps this is just common in the circles I'm in, but it disturbs me. Perhaps this has to do with our culture of acceptance and acknowledgement that we are all different. Instead of being the friends that challenge, we have become the friends that accept. Yes, unconditional love and acceptance are wonderful, but not at the cost of watering down truth. Instead of asking our friends if their decision is wise, we bite our tongues, paste a smile on and congratulate them. Why? Because in many cases, we don't want to hurt their feelings or ruin the friendship.
This feel-good friendship can be bad enough when applied to decisions. When it concerns wrongdoing on the part of our friends, the impact is disastrous. Perhaps you've seen this happen. Someone hurts someone else. Perhaps it was intentional, perhaps not. Regardless of the intent, a person is left hurting. This doesn't just affect the individual but the surrounding community. Perhaps a ministry leader spoke unkindly out of haste or personal hurt. When those in the community, perhaps close friends, learn of their friend's wound I have noticed an interesting phenomenon. Many of these friends cannot believe or accept that the other friend would do such a thing. Rather than choosing to love their friend/ministry leader while acknowledging that he or she has made a mistake, they rebuke the other person for being hurt. Often friendships are ended, a person is silenced or even cast out from the community because we cannot acknowledging that our friends and leaders have made mistakes.
My brothers and sisters, this should not be! Friendship should not mean a refusal to accept that our friends do the wrong things. Friendship should hopefully be deep enough that we can love our friends even when they make mistakes. Personally, I want my friends to be able to confront me when I'm making mistakes and behaving badly. Yes, I want them to love me even when I screw up, but I also expect them to gently rebuke me as needed.
I am very blessed to have a best friend who does this. We have been friends since our first year of high school. She loves me very much even when I do things she doesn't agree with. Sometimes our conversations are uncomfortable because she refuses to agree with me just because. Instead she challenges my thinking and sometimes my decisions. She affirms me while acknowledging my mistakes and struggles. This isn't a feel-good friendship, but one in which I am continually being sharpened. One of the biggest blessings of this type of friendship is that I know she isn't saying one thing to my face and another to my back.
Although I can identify a problem, it's harder to come up with a solution. How does one fix something so deep rooted? For me, I have determined to speak truth. Part of this has been learning to control my own tongue in conversation and then challenge my friends to do the same. Together we are breaking the hold gossip has had on our conversations. With other friends, my challenge has been to gently remind them of the truth. Sometimes it is easier to bash our family members, especially husbands and children, than it is to focus on our behaviour. I have also chosen to be open about my struggles as a wife and mother, especially when I fail. Not only do I want true friends, I also want to be one. That means being honest and held accountable even as I do the same in turn.
What does being a good friend mean to you?
Our culture perceives friends to be supportive, encouraging individuals, ones that can speak into our lives. In Proverbs it says that as iron sharpens iron, so friends sharpen friends. Friends are not just those people that we have a great time with, but also those that challenge us to be better people. They can be the ones that warn us of potential danger resulting from our decisions. And they can also be the people who love us as God does, unconditionally.
However, in the last several years I've noticed a pattern emerge. Perhaps this is just common in the circles I'm in, but it disturbs me. Perhaps this has to do with our culture of acceptance and acknowledgement that we are all different. Instead of being the friends that challenge, we have become the friends that accept. Yes, unconditional love and acceptance are wonderful, but not at the cost of watering down truth. Instead of asking our friends if their decision is wise, we bite our tongues, paste a smile on and congratulate them. Why? Because in many cases, we don't want to hurt their feelings or ruin the friendship.
This feel-good friendship can be bad enough when applied to decisions. When it concerns wrongdoing on the part of our friends, the impact is disastrous. Perhaps you've seen this happen. Someone hurts someone else. Perhaps it was intentional, perhaps not. Regardless of the intent, a person is left hurting. This doesn't just affect the individual but the surrounding community. Perhaps a ministry leader spoke unkindly out of haste or personal hurt. When those in the community, perhaps close friends, learn of their friend's wound I have noticed an interesting phenomenon. Many of these friends cannot believe or accept that the other friend would do such a thing. Rather than choosing to love their friend/ministry leader while acknowledging that he or she has made a mistake, they rebuke the other person for being hurt. Often friendships are ended, a person is silenced or even cast out from the community because we cannot acknowledging that our friends and leaders have made mistakes.
My brothers and sisters, this should not be! Friendship should not mean a refusal to accept that our friends do the wrong things. Friendship should hopefully be deep enough that we can love our friends even when they make mistakes. Personally, I want my friends to be able to confront me when I'm making mistakes and behaving badly. Yes, I want them to love me even when I screw up, but I also expect them to gently rebuke me as needed.
I am very blessed to have a best friend who does this. We have been friends since our first year of high school. She loves me very much even when I do things she doesn't agree with. Sometimes our conversations are uncomfortable because she refuses to agree with me just because. Instead she challenges my thinking and sometimes my decisions. She affirms me while acknowledging my mistakes and struggles. This isn't a feel-good friendship, but one in which I am continually being sharpened. One of the biggest blessings of this type of friendship is that I know she isn't saying one thing to my face and another to my back.
Although I can identify a problem, it's harder to come up with a solution. How does one fix something so deep rooted? For me, I have determined to speak truth. Part of this has been learning to control my own tongue in conversation and then challenge my friends to do the same. Together we are breaking the hold gossip has had on our conversations. With other friends, my challenge has been to gently remind them of the truth. Sometimes it is easier to bash our family members, especially husbands and children, than it is to focus on our behaviour. I have also chosen to be open about my struggles as a wife and mother, especially when I fail. Not only do I want true friends, I also want to be one. That means being honest and held accountable even as I do the same in turn.
What does being a good friend mean to you?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
How Do I Do That?
Welcome to my post on Radical. We're on chapter five this week.
In Matthew 28:19, we are commanded to make disciples of all nations. This isn't a suggestion or a maybe or a "if you feel so led" please go and disciples. In the preceding verse, Jesus says that we are given all authority on heaven and earth. He doesn't follow this up by saying please live a good life, take great vacations and say a prayer before you go to bed and at every meal. Instead He gifts us with His supernatural power for the specific purpose of making disciples, baptizing them and then teaching them to obey what God has taught us. So how on earth to we go about doing that?
For me, this command can conjure up a lot of anxiety. It also brings up a lot of toos and nots. I'm too busy, I'm too tired, I'm too broken, my kids are too crazy, my house is too messy, my church has too many issues, I'm not spiritual enough, I'm not ready for this, I'm not.... the list could go on. But all of these concerns are beside the point. Am I a follower of Christ? If the answer is yes, nothing else matters. No matter what my issues are, if I'm a Christian I am commanded to make disciples.
So then who do I disciple? Do I put an add on Craigslist? "If you would like to learn about Jesus, please contact Grace?" Do I randomly approach people and ask them if they'd like to know Jesus better? Well, those are possibilities, but I'm not sure I would recommend them. Rather, I think we are meant to begin with those we know. So who do I know? Who are my friends? If all my friends are Christians, I am most likely a disinfected Christian rather than a discipler.
Until last year, I belonged in that category. Most of my social interaction took place within the community of believers, although I did have some friends outside the faith. Then last fall happened, and overnight I lost most of my friends within my church. I experienced social ostracism. Although this has been a very hard thing, it has had the benefit of kicking me out into my community. I have more time to listen, more willingness to befriend, and a great desire to spend time with others. Because of this, I have finally made good friends among my neighbours and school mates. Instead of fellowshipping only with other believers, we have been actively building friendships with those in our community. They are the people we have over for dinner, go to movies with, and drink tea with. Since last year, I think I can now call myself a discipler.
For the most part, I believe that discipling happens informally. Currently, the woman that I am discipling has no idea that this is happening. She isn't even a follower of Christ. Yet. But I believe that she will be eventually. It's happening much slower than I would like, but God is at work in her life and heart. I didn't chose her, God did. Lizzie(not her real name) has children in the same classes as my children. We also walk the same way to and from school. Our kids really like each other, but she drives me nuts. The first year we met, I really didn't want to talk to her. During that year, I never invited her in even though we stood in my yard chatting. I was too busy, my house was too messy, and I was not interested in being her friend.
Summer came, and God disciplined my selfish heart. I realized how badly Lizzie needs Jesus, and how much her children need her to find Him. Swallowing my selfishness, I repented and told God that if He brought her into my life again, I would invite her in. Come fall and the start of school, Lizzie was back in my life. I took a deep breath, prayed and invited her over. The first time, she stayed for tea. The next she stayed for dinner. After our third visit, God told me to invite her to church. Other than saying grace and mentioning that my children's art was made at Sunday school, I had not had a single spiritual conversation with her. But I felt very strongly that I was to invite her to church. It was Friday afternoon, I was engaged in conversation with another friend when I saw Lizzie. Breaking off quickly, I darted over and asked "Random awkward question: Woud you like to go to church with me on Sunday?" Strangely she said yes. Lizzie didn't come that Sunday, but she came the next. I'd like to say that she's started following Christ, but she hasn't yet. However, she is seeking and we're continuing to come alongside her as she is ready, communicating God's great love for her with our actions and unconditional love and care.
I'm coming to learn that discipleship is about obeying God's call and living openly. We just celebrated Canadian Thanksgiving this past weekend. My husband's family has been journeying with us in reaching our community. As a result, they opened their home and table to six Asian students they've been connecting with. My family invited over two neighbour couples, both Russian(mostly). One family also follows Christ, the other doesn't. The unbelieving family attended the Oktoberfest parade with us. While we were waiting for the parade to start, a woman came along handing out tracks. To be honest, this woman makes me embarrassed to call myself a Christian. I disagree with both her methods and her theology. Even after we politely refused the tracks, saying that we already know Christ, she pressed them on us with warnings of hellfire. *sigh* My daughter read the track and then handed it over, saying that she already knows Jesus. Her faith warms my heart. The neighbour boy also read the track and then asked who is this Jesus Christ. With his father's permission, I was able to briefly explain the Gospel. While hiking with my menfolk through the woods, this same little boy commented that we believe in God and his parents don't. We haven't done anything other than live our lives openly, inviting them in. Steve and I have both had honest faith conversations with his parents and we prayerfully anticipate many more.
I could keep writing because this is a subject I'm passionate about. Discipling is hard. There are many times when I don't want to engage others in conversation, when I don't want to open my home, when I am too tired and hurt to open my heart to new friends. I don't feel capable of leading others to Christ. But I ache for my beautiful friends. I want them to experience the amazingness of a relationship with Christ. My answer to everything is prayer and I want them to have that option too. Since these are my friends and neighbours, it's up to me to buck up and obey Christ's command to make disciples. I have to say that in all honesty, I wouldn't go back to being a disinfected believer, only interacting with other believers. Although I feel inadequate most days, I also feel alive and purposeful. May you discover the joys of sharing your life with whomever God brings into your path. May we go forth and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them and teaching them to obey God. My next step is to invite someone over for dinner once a week. What's yours?
In Matthew 28:19, we are commanded to make disciples of all nations. This isn't a suggestion or a maybe or a "if you feel so led" please go and disciples. In the preceding verse, Jesus says that we are given all authority on heaven and earth. He doesn't follow this up by saying please live a good life, take great vacations and say a prayer before you go to bed and at every meal. Instead He gifts us with His supernatural power for the specific purpose of making disciples, baptizing them and then teaching them to obey what God has taught us. So how on earth to we go about doing that?
For me, this command can conjure up a lot of anxiety. It also brings up a lot of toos and nots. I'm too busy, I'm too tired, I'm too broken, my kids are too crazy, my house is too messy, my church has too many issues, I'm not spiritual enough, I'm not ready for this, I'm not.... the list could go on. But all of these concerns are beside the point. Am I a follower of Christ? If the answer is yes, nothing else matters. No matter what my issues are, if I'm a Christian I am commanded to make disciples.
So then who do I disciple? Do I put an add on Craigslist? "If you would like to learn about Jesus, please contact Grace?" Do I randomly approach people and ask them if they'd like to know Jesus better? Well, those are possibilities, but I'm not sure I would recommend them. Rather, I think we are meant to begin with those we know. So who do I know? Who are my friends? If all my friends are Christians, I am most likely a disinfected Christian rather than a discipler.
Until last year, I belonged in that category. Most of my social interaction took place within the community of believers, although I did have some friends outside the faith. Then last fall happened, and overnight I lost most of my friends within my church. I experienced social ostracism. Although this has been a very hard thing, it has had the benefit of kicking me out into my community. I have more time to listen, more willingness to befriend, and a great desire to spend time with others. Because of this, I have finally made good friends among my neighbours and school mates. Instead of fellowshipping only with other believers, we have been actively building friendships with those in our community. They are the people we have over for dinner, go to movies with, and drink tea with. Since last year, I think I can now call myself a discipler.
For the most part, I believe that discipling happens informally. Currently, the woman that I am discipling has no idea that this is happening. She isn't even a follower of Christ. Yet. But I believe that she will be eventually. It's happening much slower than I would like, but God is at work in her life and heart. I didn't chose her, God did. Lizzie(not her real name) has children in the same classes as my children. We also walk the same way to and from school. Our kids really like each other, but she drives me nuts. The first year we met, I really didn't want to talk to her. During that year, I never invited her in even though we stood in my yard chatting. I was too busy, my house was too messy, and I was not interested in being her friend.
Summer came, and God disciplined my selfish heart. I realized how badly Lizzie needs Jesus, and how much her children need her to find Him. Swallowing my selfishness, I repented and told God that if He brought her into my life again, I would invite her in. Come fall and the start of school, Lizzie was back in my life. I took a deep breath, prayed and invited her over. The first time, she stayed for tea. The next she stayed for dinner. After our third visit, God told me to invite her to church. Other than saying grace and mentioning that my children's art was made at Sunday school, I had not had a single spiritual conversation with her. But I felt very strongly that I was to invite her to church. It was Friday afternoon, I was engaged in conversation with another friend when I saw Lizzie. Breaking off quickly, I darted over and asked "Random awkward question: Woud you like to go to church with me on Sunday?" Strangely she said yes. Lizzie didn't come that Sunday, but she came the next. I'd like to say that she's started following Christ, but she hasn't yet. However, she is seeking and we're continuing to come alongside her as she is ready, communicating God's great love for her with our actions and unconditional love and care.
I'm coming to learn that discipleship is about obeying God's call and living openly. We just celebrated Canadian Thanksgiving this past weekend. My husband's family has been journeying with us in reaching our community. As a result, they opened their home and table to six Asian students they've been connecting with. My family invited over two neighbour couples, both Russian(mostly). One family also follows Christ, the other doesn't. The unbelieving family attended the Oktoberfest parade with us. While we were waiting for the parade to start, a woman came along handing out tracks. To be honest, this woman makes me embarrassed to call myself a Christian. I disagree with both her methods and her theology. Even after we politely refused the tracks, saying that we already know Christ, she pressed them on us with warnings of hellfire. *sigh* My daughter read the track and then handed it over, saying that she already knows Jesus. Her faith warms my heart. The neighbour boy also read the track and then asked who is this Jesus Christ. With his father's permission, I was able to briefly explain the Gospel. While hiking with my menfolk through the woods, this same little boy commented that we believe in God and his parents don't. We haven't done anything other than live our lives openly, inviting them in. Steve and I have both had honest faith conversations with his parents and we prayerfully anticipate many more.
I could keep writing because this is a subject I'm passionate about. Discipling is hard. There are many times when I don't want to engage others in conversation, when I don't want to open my home, when I am too tired and hurt to open my heart to new friends. I don't feel capable of leading others to Christ. But I ache for my beautiful friends. I want them to experience the amazingness of a relationship with Christ. My answer to everything is prayer and I want them to have that option too. Since these are my friends and neighbours, it's up to me to buck up and obey Christ's command to make disciples. I have to say that in all honesty, I wouldn't go back to being a disinfected believer, only interacting with other believers. Although I feel inadequate most days, I also feel alive and purposeful. May you discover the joys of sharing your life with whomever God brings into your path. May we go forth and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them and teaching them to obey God. My next step is to invite someone over for dinner once a week. What's yours?
Monday, October 4, 2010
The World Is Here
This is my Radical Read-along post with Marla for week 4. This chapter is about God's global purpose which is to glorify Himself. Platt argues that as believers we are all commanded to impact the entire world for Him.
I think this has been the hardest chapter for me. I struggled with it on my first read through and I still do, just not for the reasons you might think. Perhaps I should start at the beginning...
Just over thirty years ago, a man on a short-term building trip met a full-time teacher at a little mission on the Texas-Mexico border. He asked her to marry him and she said yes. Two days after their first anniversary, I arrived. My parents never forgot their missions experience. It wasn't all positive, but their desire to serve God even in another culture, another climate(let's just say the Mexicans didn't believe my dad's stories about snow) and another language shaped how they raised me. My dad is a story-teller, a very good one at that. Throughout my childhood, he told my sister and I many stories about how my parents met and about that little mission in that little border town. Between my dad's stories and my mother's speaking to us in Spanish, a desire to go grew in my heart. My parents nurtured that desire. My mother's bookshelves held stories of missionaries that I read over and over. While I attended a Christian school, I read and re-read the missionary bibliographies. I was fascinated by these people who heard a call, sacrificed everything and went. I wanted to go too.
As a teen, I had a subscription to Brio magazine. Every year, it came with a full-colour short-term missions insert. I read the descriptions with an aching heart. Each description filled me with a desire to go there, to serve there. My parents couldn't send me on their own, so we asked our pastor about raising support. Unfortunately, I attended a very conservative church that did not support anything outside of their particular group. After reading through the brochure, my pastor pronounced it a waste of money and if I wanted to see the world it could be done a lot cheaper than that. I was heartbroken. But the call of God didn't leave.
This call hasn't left yet. I still have this unspecified longing to go into the world and preach the Gospel. But this funny thing happened...God said no. We've tried to go at least three times on a short-term mission trip and each time God has said no. It's been frustrating. What makes it even more interesting is that my husband and I are full-time missionaries. We are commissioned by our church to spread the Gospel. Not only that, but we raise and live on support. We've tried to go overseas, we want to go overseas, but God keeps saying no. Instead, Steve works at the Canadian head office using his considerable tech talents for God's glory. So when I read this chapter about how we are all supposed to go, I struggled. Is God wrong? How can this be His plan for all of us to go when He won't let me?
Or maybe His plan for us is different. I live in a very multi-cultural area. It isn't as diverse as some of the bigger cities, but for this size of city, it's quite multicultural. Not only is this city one of six refugee settlement areas across Canada, it is also home to two major universities. People from all over the world come here for their undergrad, masters and graduate degrees as well as for post-doc studies. Because we live in inexpensive housing close to the university, many of our neighbours and friends at school are from different nations. Many are students, some are immigrants, some are refugees. We also live right near a major tech hub. Perhaps you've heard of the BlackBerry? Yeah, they make that here. Not only are the massive RIM headquarters down the street, there are also many high-tech companies and research institutes here including Ratheon and the Quantum Institute. Who works there? Well, people from all over the world.
At our very small school, there are over 30 languages represented. Among my friends, I know people from Russia, Israel, the Bahamas, the Philippines, Syria, Afghanistan, Eritrea, Somalia, China, Vietnam, Laos, Scotland, Australia and India to name a few. After meeting all of these wonderful people, it hit me that I could whine about how much I wanted to go into the world and reach others for Christ, or I could get off my butt and start reaching out to my neighbours. While some of my friends are here to stay, others will be going back to their country of origin. Most of those that chose to stay still have contact with their countrymen. What would happen if these people from all over the world came to Christ? What would happen if they were discipled, trained and equipped to spread the Gospel in their country in their language? Would this not be accomplishing God's great global purpose of spreading His glory throughout the earth?
I still want to go. The problem is I want to go everywhere. Well, that and that God keeps saying no. But He does seem to be saying yes to serving here. He even seems to be equipping me. Since I'm a member of a missions organization, albeit a member who hasn't been off the continent yet, I've gotten a lot of extra training. I've taken cross-cultural training, have sat in on discussions on engaging our world for Christ, and have even been able to attend a workshop on ministering to M*slims. As a member of this organization, I have access to some of the best misisional minds out there. If I need training, I can get it. Even as I type this, I'm starting to get excited about the possibilites of accomplishing God's great global purpose here. Like I mentioned last week, I'm praying that God will bring everyone connected with my school to Christ. Can you imagine the possibilities? I am excited to reach my friends with the Gospel with the purpose of enabling them to reach their friends, family members and people-groups. It could spark a never-ending chain of faith explosions.
The bottom line? Are all Christians commissioned to go into all the world and preach the Gospel? Definitely! But does this look the same for everybody? Probably not. Go then, discover your unique calling, and impact the world for Christ.
I think this has been the hardest chapter for me. I struggled with it on my first read through and I still do, just not for the reasons you might think. Perhaps I should start at the beginning...
Just over thirty years ago, a man on a short-term building trip met a full-time teacher at a little mission on the Texas-Mexico border. He asked her to marry him and she said yes. Two days after their first anniversary, I arrived. My parents never forgot their missions experience. It wasn't all positive, but their desire to serve God even in another culture, another climate(let's just say the Mexicans didn't believe my dad's stories about snow) and another language shaped how they raised me. My dad is a story-teller, a very good one at that. Throughout my childhood, he told my sister and I many stories about how my parents met and about that little mission in that little border town. Between my dad's stories and my mother's speaking to us in Spanish, a desire to go grew in my heart. My parents nurtured that desire. My mother's bookshelves held stories of missionaries that I read over and over. While I attended a Christian school, I read and re-read the missionary bibliographies. I was fascinated by these people who heard a call, sacrificed everything and went. I wanted to go too.
As a teen, I had a subscription to Brio magazine. Every year, it came with a full-colour short-term missions insert. I read the descriptions with an aching heart. Each description filled me with a desire to go there, to serve there. My parents couldn't send me on their own, so we asked our pastor about raising support. Unfortunately, I attended a very conservative church that did not support anything outside of their particular group. After reading through the brochure, my pastor pronounced it a waste of money and if I wanted to see the world it could be done a lot cheaper than that. I was heartbroken. But the call of God didn't leave.
This call hasn't left yet. I still have this unspecified longing to go into the world and preach the Gospel. But this funny thing happened...God said no. We've tried to go at least three times on a short-term mission trip and each time God has said no. It's been frustrating. What makes it even more interesting is that my husband and I are full-time missionaries. We are commissioned by our church to spread the Gospel. Not only that, but we raise and live on support. We've tried to go overseas, we want to go overseas, but God keeps saying no. Instead, Steve works at the Canadian head office using his considerable tech talents for God's glory. So when I read this chapter about how we are all supposed to go, I struggled. Is God wrong? How can this be His plan for all of us to go when He won't let me?
Or maybe His plan for us is different. I live in a very multi-cultural area. It isn't as diverse as some of the bigger cities, but for this size of city, it's quite multicultural. Not only is this city one of six refugee settlement areas across Canada, it is also home to two major universities. People from all over the world come here for their undergrad, masters and graduate degrees as well as for post-doc studies. Because we live in inexpensive housing close to the university, many of our neighbours and friends at school are from different nations. Many are students, some are immigrants, some are refugees. We also live right near a major tech hub. Perhaps you've heard of the BlackBerry? Yeah, they make that here. Not only are the massive RIM headquarters down the street, there are also many high-tech companies and research institutes here including Ratheon and the Quantum Institute. Who works there? Well, people from all over the world.
At our very small school, there are over 30 languages represented. Among my friends, I know people from Russia, Israel, the Bahamas, the Philippines, Syria, Afghanistan, Eritrea, Somalia, China, Vietnam, Laos, Scotland, Australia and India to name a few. After meeting all of these wonderful people, it hit me that I could whine about how much I wanted to go into the world and reach others for Christ, or I could get off my butt and start reaching out to my neighbours. While some of my friends are here to stay, others will be going back to their country of origin. Most of those that chose to stay still have contact with their countrymen. What would happen if these people from all over the world came to Christ? What would happen if they were discipled, trained and equipped to spread the Gospel in their country in their language? Would this not be accomplishing God's great global purpose of spreading His glory throughout the earth?
I still want to go. The problem is I want to go everywhere. Well, that and that God keeps saying no. But He does seem to be saying yes to serving here. He even seems to be equipping me. Since I'm a member of a missions organization, albeit a member who hasn't been off the continent yet, I've gotten a lot of extra training. I've taken cross-cultural training, have sat in on discussions on engaging our world for Christ, and have even been able to attend a workshop on ministering to M*slims. As a member of this organization, I have access to some of the best misisional minds out there. If I need training, I can get it. Even as I type this, I'm starting to get excited about the possibilites of accomplishing God's great global purpose here. Like I mentioned last week, I'm praying that God will bring everyone connected with my school to Christ. Can you imagine the possibilities? I am excited to reach my friends with the Gospel with the purpose of enabling them to reach their friends, family members and people-groups. It could spark a never-ending chain of faith explosions.
The bottom line? Are all Christians commissioned to go into all the world and preach the Gospel? Definitely! But does this look the same for everybody? Probably not. Go then, discover your unique calling, and impact the world for Christ.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Shameless Plug
On Saturday, October 2nd, my two oldest monkeys will be participating in the Ride for Refuge formerly known as the Ride for Refugee. I believe this is the 7th ride and my family's fifth year participating. The money raised by my family will go to supporting a local refugee housing community and towards building a school in Sudan.
This is the second year that my children have ridden. Last year they chose to ride after becoming friends with a refugee family at their school. This family had fled persecution in Africa because of their faith. The mother had been jailed, and the father remains there in prison. His crime? Pastoring a church not approved by the government. They have four beautiful children ranging in age from 10 to 4 years old. The second youngest struggles with anxiety resulting from their struggles. We are so thankful that they made it safely here and have been granted refugee status.
This year, my children wanted to ride again. In April, they started telling us how much they want to ride. So, here they are, preparing for another ride day. Steve and I will be chasing them with Kian on somebody's back. :) If you would like to support them financially, click here to support Aris and here to support Zane. Please keep us in prayer on Saturday that we would participate well, being kind towards each other and not impatient even when exhaustion sets in. Click here to see this year's awesome ride video. It details the history and the importance of the ride. Together, we can change the world.
This is the second year that my children have ridden. Last year they chose to ride after becoming friends with a refugee family at their school. This family had fled persecution in Africa because of their faith. The mother had been jailed, and the father remains there in prison. His crime? Pastoring a church not approved by the government. They have four beautiful children ranging in age from 10 to 4 years old. The second youngest struggles with anxiety resulting from their struggles. We are so thankful that they made it safely here and have been granted refugee status.
This year, my children wanted to ride again. In April, they started telling us how much they want to ride. So, here they are, preparing for another ride day. Steve and I will be chasing them with Kian on somebody's back. :) If you would like to support them financially, click here to support Aris and here to support Zane. Please keep us in prayer on Saturday that we would participate well, being kind towards each other and not impatient even when exhaustion sets in. Click here to see this year's awesome ride video. It details the history and the importance of the ride. Together, we can change the world.
Monday, September 27, 2010
The Blessings of Failure
I'm joining with Marla and friends for week 3 of the Radical Read-Along. This week's chapter is on the importance of relying on God's power.
In this culture, we are told that it is possible to achieve any goal if we work hard enough. There is inspirational story after inspirational story about a boy or girl who grew up rough, worked three jobs, put themselves through university, never ever gave up, ate crackers for one whole year and now is the chief cardio surgeon at a major hospital, university professor, billionaire entrepreneur, president, lawyer, fill-in-the-blank. We tell our children that they can be anything they want to be, that they can achieve any goal if they put their minds to it. This is a can-do culture. There is no obstacle that creativity, determination, ingenuity and hard work can't overcome. And in this culture, we really don't need God for anything other than a feel good fix, a sense of morality or someone to thank during our acceptance speech.
That's sad. And wrong.
We don't hear about the people who fail. We hear about those who fail and succeed, but not the ones that work their tushies off only to burn out or fall ill because of the immense physical and emotional stress that comes with that lifestyle. We don't hear about the ones who try their best only to be consistently told that it isn't good enough. Not only do we not talk about them, they're the ones we look down on. The ones that couldn't just rise above, couldn't make it on their own but instead dropped out, filed for bankruptcy, or started popping pills and attending regular therapy sessions to cope with depression or other mental health issues.
Can you guess which category I'm in?
I would label myself as a failure. I've struggled with depression since I was a young child, was severely bullied on several occasions and just generally didn't fit in. I'm not crafty, not athletic, mathematically challenged, and definitely not a good housekeeper! I dropped out of university on the verge of burnout after working full-time and attending school full-time because I was single and pregnant with my first child. Currently I'm battling both chronic fatigue and post-traumatic stress disorder. Neither of these are fun. Both of these illnesses easily earn me the failure label. However, in my failures, I've learned something amazing.
Failure isn't a bad thing. Neither is being inadequate.
The amazing thing about failure is that it points us to God. Doesn't just point us there, failure sends us directly to God, often on our knees. I cry out to God because I am dependent on Him. My crisis pregnancy was really a lifesaver, because through that horrible experience I came back to God and met Him in a whole new way. When I lost my ability to walk in the last months of my pregnancy, I spent most of my time praying and in the Word. Failure was a very good thing for me.
Failure doesn't just force me to depend on God, it means that I give Him all the glory. The Scripture says that no one comes to God unless he or she is called by the Holy Spirit. That's easy to forget when we have a rocking worship band, a well-spoken pastor, an uber-friendly congregation, dynamic small groups and a great outreach program. Platt says" I am frightened by the reality that the church I lead can carry on most of our activities smoothly, efficiently, even successfully, never realizing that the Holy Spirit of God is virtually absent from the picture"(p.50). This frightens me. I don't want to be so reliant on my own abilities that I stop relying on the awesome power of the Holy Spirit who can do more than I can ask or imagine.
Another good thing about being inadequate is that I have seen God show up and do something amazing. About three years ago, I connected with a young single mom. It was a God-thing in and how we met, with both of us being in the right place at the right time and then me stepping completely out of my comfort zone, chasing her down, knocking on her door and introducing myself. Strangely, she didn't run away. We became friends, but I felt as if I failed her. I didn't try hard enough to connect, didn't chase her down more, didn't speak more about God to her. She'd randomly show up at my door, often when I was in the middle of chaos, I'd invite her in and we'd chat. One day we hung out and she revealed that she'd recently became a Christian. That was awesome! But still, she struggled and wandered and I was busy with my own life. Several months ago, I worried about how much I had failed her. It made me sad. Then a couple weeks later, she was back in my life. As we talked, I was amazed to learn how much I had encouraged and supported her when I felt the opposite. For me, this was God's way of saying "It is not about you! Not at all!" She asked me to be one of her bridesmaids and is a very special friend of mine. I honestly can't take the credit for that.
In the last couple months, I've had other encounters like that. Places where I wasn't good enough, didn't put enough in and God showed up and did something amazing, far beyond what I had hoped or dreamed. I've learned a lot about what God can do. I've also learned about what I need to do. It's simple: I need to believe, obey and pray.
I've written before about BHAGs. After seeing what God has done and after reading this chapter of Radical, about the Holy Spirit's indwelling power, I have a new Big Hairy Audacious Goal. Currently I am praying that God will bring every person in my children's school, from the principal down to the extended family members of the students to a saving knowledge of Christ. Can I do this? Nope, not at all. Can God? Well, He saved about three thousand people in one day in Acts, so I'm pretty sure a school of about 200 students in a year isn't a challenge. :)
My encouragement to you is to not let failure discourage you. Rather, embrace the One who is able to do all things. If you try to be perfect, it's okay to stop. Let God be at work in you this year. As you fail, rejoice in the amazing things He does. Don't just stop there though. I challenge you to set a crazy God-sized goal that only He can fulfill. Then pray and see what He can do. It might not look the way you expect, but it's bound to be spectacular.
In this culture, we are told that it is possible to achieve any goal if we work hard enough. There is inspirational story after inspirational story about a boy or girl who grew up rough, worked three jobs, put themselves through university, never ever gave up, ate crackers for one whole year and now is the chief cardio surgeon at a major hospital, university professor, billionaire entrepreneur, president, lawyer, fill-in-the-blank. We tell our children that they can be anything they want to be, that they can achieve any goal if they put their minds to it. This is a can-do culture. There is no obstacle that creativity, determination, ingenuity and hard work can't overcome. And in this culture, we really don't need God for anything other than a feel good fix, a sense of morality or someone to thank during our acceptance speech.
That's sad. And wrong.
We don't hear about the people who fail. We hear about those who fail and succeed, but not the ones that work their tushies off only to burn out or fall ill because of the immense physical and emotional stress that comes with that lifestyle. We don't hear about the ones who try their best only to be consistently told that it isn't good enough. Not only do we not talk about them, they're the ones we look down on. The ones that couldn't just rise above, couldn't make it on their own but instead dropped out, filed for bankruptcy, or started popping pills and attending regular therapy sessions to cope with depression or other mental health issues.
Can you guess which category I'm in?
I would label myself as a failure. I've struggled with depression since I was a young child, was severely bullied on several occasions and just generally didn't fit in. I'm not crafty, not athletic, mathematically challenged, and definitely not a good housekeeper! I dropped out of university on the verge of burnout after working full-time and attending school full-time because I was single and pregnant with my first child. Currently I'm battling both chronic fatigue and post-traumatic stress disorder. Neither of these are fun. Both of these illnesses easily earn me the failure label. However, in my failures, I've learned something amazing.
Failure isn't a bad thing. Neither is being inadequate.
The amazing thing about failure is that it points us to God. Doesn't just point us there, failure sends us directly to God, often on our knees. I cry out to God because I am dependent on Him. My crisis pregnancy was really a lifesaver, because through that horrible experience I came back to God and met Him in a whole new way. When I lost my ability to walk in the last months of my pregnancy, I spent most of my time praying and in the Word. Failure was a very good thing for me.
Failure doesn't just force me to depend on God, it means that I give Him all the glory. The Scripture says that no one comes to God unless he or she is called by the Holy Spirit. That's easy to forget when we have a rocking worship band, a well-spoken pastor, an uber-friendly congregation, dynamic small groups and a great outreach program. Platt says" I am frightened by the reality that the church I lead can carry on most of our activities smoothly, efficiently, even successfully, never realizing that the Holy Spirit of God is virtually absent from the picture"(p.50). This frightens me. I don't want to be so reliant on my own abilities that I stop relying on the awesome power of the Holy Spirit who can do more than I can ask or imagine.
Another good thing about being inadequate is that I have seen God show up and do something amazing. About three years ago, I connected with a young single mom. It was a God-thing in and how we met, with both of us being in the right place at the right time and then me stepping completely out of my comfort zone, chasing her down, knocking on her door and introducing myself. Strangely, she didn't run away. We became friends, but I felt as if I failed her. I didn't try hard enough to connect, didn't chase her down more, didn't speak more about God to her. She'd randomly show up at my door, often when I was in the middle of chaos, I'd invite her in and we'd chat. One day we hung out and she revealed that she'd recently became a Christian. That was awesome! But still, she struggled and wandered and I was busy with my own life. Several months ago, I worried about how much I had failed her. It made me sad. Then a couple weeks later, she was back in my life. As we talked, I was amazed to learn how much I had encouraged and supported her when I felt the opposite. For me, this was God's way of saying "It is not about you! Not at all!" She asked me to be one of her bridesmaids and is a very special friend of mine. I honestly can't take the credit for that.
In the last couple months, I've had other encounters like that. Places where I wasn't good enough, didn't put enough in and God showed up and did something amazing, far beyond what I had hoped or dreamed. I've learned a lot about what God can do. I've also learned about what I need to do. It's simple: I need to believe, obey and pray.
I've written before about BHAGs. After seeing what God has done and after reading this chapter of Radical, about the Holy Spirit's indwelling power, I have a new Big Hairy Audacious Goal. Currently I am praying that God will bring every person in my children's school, from the principal down to the extended family members of the students to a saving knowledge of Christ. Can I do this? Nope, not at all. Can God? Well, He saved about three thousand people in one day in Acts, so I'm pretty sure a school of about 200 students in a year isn't a challenge. :)
My encouragement to you is to not let failure discourage you. Rather, embrace the One who is able to do all things. If you try to be perfect, it's okay to stop. Let God be at work in you this year. As you fail, rejoice in the amazing things He does. Don't just stop there though. I challenge you to set a crazy God-sized goal that only He can fulfill. Then pray and see what He can do. It might not look the way you expect, but it's bound to be spectacular.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Milk
I'm joining with Marla for week two of the Radical Read-along.
May I take a moment to say that this book, specifically this chapter, has changed my life? I know, I know, this sounds so cliched and overused, but really it has. So last month, I started reading Radical. Now, I get so wrapped up into books that I don't typically notice chapter breaks. Until I sat down to re-read Chapter 1, I thought that the part that impacted me the most was the first chapter. Nope, it was the second one. I need to preface this post that there is just too much to cover properly in one post. I've decided that I'm going to just stick with describing how it changed my life. However, that leaves out a lot of really good important material. I may have to post again. We'll see. Anyhoo....here's my story.
What hit me the most in this chapter was the insatiable hunger that the persecuted church has for God's word. I do not have that hunger. For most of my life, I've read the Bible daily. I've gone through fasts where I've only read God's Word. But to be honest, that's been out of a sense of obligation. My pastors say that God speaks to me through His word, so I'm going to read it. But for the most part, I'd prefer a novel. And since I typically am reading something interesting, I often skimp on my Bible reading or approach it with a sense of duty rather than with anything close to hunger.
Reading about the intense hunger these believers had for God's Word really convicted me. For years I've journaled my prayers, so I grabbed my Bible and my journal and headed outside. Sitting next to my forest, I prayed, confessed my reluctance to read God's word, asked for a holy hunger and then began to read where I had left off. This verse leaped off the page and grabbed me by the throat: "Like newborn babies, you must crave pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, now that you have had a taste of the Lord's kindness." 1 Peter 2:2-3
It's hard for me to explain fully how deeply that verse impacted me. I should probably mention that I'm a lactavist. I've exclusively breastfed my three babies and believe that breastmilk is normal for human babies. Although I am very sensitive to the intense emotion surrounding feeding choices, I strongly believe that babies should be breastfed or given human milk in place of formula. After reading the verses above, I suddenly looked at my faith through the lenses of a lactivist. I have to say I was horrified with what was revealed.
Although I hold up the Bible as the Inspired Word of God suitable for instruction, discipline and encouragement, I don't live that way. Rather I've implemented my own form of "Breast is Best" whereby Scripture is best, but second best is okay. Reading devotionals, Christian fiction or inspirational books or even some great blogs are just as good as reading the Bible. I skim through my Bible reading or only half listen during the sermon because after all, I already know what's in the Bible, right? I desire spiritual junk food, a heavily processed and salted gospel, rather than the pure spiritual milk. As a result, I've wandered. The previous verse(1 Peter 2:1) tells us to get rid of all evil behaviours. He gives a list including unkind speech. I'm sure the others apply, but as I've rejected the Bible, my speech became unkind. I grew even more sarcastic, accusing, short-tempered and prone to gossip. In fact, I became addicted to gossip and forgot how to converse without gossipping. Those memories fill me with shame. (I should insert here that God has been dealing with me on gossipping for the past two years. He began the process after an innocent conversation with an unbelieving neighbour first revealed how wrong gossip is. It's still an area of temptation for me, but one in which I've seen huge victory.)
As you can imagine, reading those verses immediately after reading the accounts of those hungry believers had an immediate impact. I began a new practice of reading my Bible with my journal in hand. I would read and then write out my prayers, digging into the Bible in a whole new way. I've kept up that practice in the days and weeks that have followed. It's been almost a month now of reading, praying and digging deeper. I'm moving through the Scriptures slowly, verse by verse, sometimes skipping backwards if a verse grabs me or rereading entire passages for days in a row. And in the process I'm learning something new. God is speaking to me through His word. There have been several times now where I have cried out to God and then been answered the very next day by a verse I was reading. It is an incredible experience. Also slightly shocking, since I'm not used to reading the Bible like a Skype chat conversation.
Writing this is hard. I am ashamed to reveal my previous passivity towards God's Word. It pains me to see how deep sin got a foothold in my life as a result. But it is so exciting to see that as I read in this daily new way, God changes me. The growth in my life has been spectacular this past month. My prayer is that I will continue to desire Him and will crave His Word more and more.
May I take a moment to say that this book, specifically this chapter, has changed my life? I know, I know, this sounds so cliched and overused, but really it has. So last month, I started reading Radical. Now, I get so wrapped up into books that I don't typically notice chapter breaks. Until I sat down to re-read Chapter 1, I thought that the part that impacted me the most was the first chapter. Nope, it was the second one. I need to preface this post that there is just too much to cover properly in one post. I've decided that I'm going to just stick with describing how it changed my life. However, that leaves out a lot of really good important material. I may have to post again. We'll see. Anyhoo....here's my story.
What hit me the most in this chapter was the insatiable hunger that the persecuted church has for God's word. I do not have that hunger. For most of my life, I've read the Bible daily. I've gone through fasts where I've only read God's Word. But to be honest, that's been out of a sense of obligation. My pastors say that God speaks to me through His word, so I'm going to read it. But for the most part, I'd prefer a novel. And since I typically am reading something interesting, I often skimp on my Bible reading or approach it with a sense of duty rather than with anything close to hunger.
Reading about the intense hunger these believers had for God's Word really convicted me. For years I've journaled my prayers, so I grabbed my Bible and my journal and headed outside. Sitting next to my forest, I prayed, confessed my reluctance to read God's word, asked for a holy hunger and then began to read where I had left off. This verse leaped off the page and grabbed me by the throat: "Like newborn babies, you must crave pure spiritual milk so that you will grow into a full experience of salvation. Cry out for this nourishment, now that you have had a taste of the Lord's kindness." 1 Peter 2:2-3
It's hard for me to explain fully how deeply that verse impacted me. I should probably mention that I'm a lactavist. I've exclusively breastfed my three babies and believe that breastmilk is normal for human babies. Although I am very sensitive to the intense emotion surrounding feeding choices, I strongly believe that babies should be breastfed or given human milk in place of formula. After reading the verses above, I suddenly looked at my faith through the lenses of a lactivist. I have to say I was horrified with what was revealed.
Although I hold up the Bible as the Inspired Word of God suitable for instruction, discipline and encouragement, I don't live that way. Rather I've implemented my own form of "Breast is Best" whereby Scripture is best, but second best is okay. Reading devotionals, Christian fiction or inspirational books or even some great blogs are just as good as reading the Bible. I skim through my Bible reading or only half listen during the sermon because after all, I already know what's in the Bible, right? I desire spiritual junk food, a heavily processed and salted gospel, rather than the pure spiritual milk. As a result, I've wandered. The previous verse(1 Peter 2:1) tells us to get rid of all evil behaviours. He gives a list including unkind speech. I'm sure the others apply, but as I've rejected the Bible, my speech became unkind. I grew even more sarcastic, accusing, short-tempered and prone to gossip. In fact, I became addicted to gossip and forgot how to converse without gossipping. Those memories fill me with shame. (I should insert here that God has been dealing with me on gossipping for the past two years. He began the process after an innocent conversation with an unbelieving neighbour first revealed how wrong gossip is. It's still an area of temptation for me, but one in which I've seen huge victory.)
As you can imagine, reading those verses immediately after reading the accounts of those hungry believers had an immediate impact. I began a new practice of reading my Bible with my journal in hand. I would read and then write out my prayers, digging into the Bible in a whole new way. I've kept up that practice in the days and weeks that have followed. It's been almost a month now of reading, praying and digging deeper. I'm moving through the Scriptures slowly, verse by verse, sometimes skipping backwards if a verse grabs me or rereading entire passages for days in a row. And in the process I'm learning something new. God is speaking to me through His word. There have been several times now where I have cried out to God and then been answered the very next day by a verse I was reading. It is an incredible experience. Also slightly shocking, since I'm not used to reading the Bible like a Skype chat conversation.
Writing this is hard. I am ashamed to reveal my previous passivity towards God's Word. It pains me to see how deep sin got a foothold in my life as a result. But it is so exciting to see that as I read in this daily new way, God changes me. The growth in my life has been spectacular this past month. My prayer is that I will continue to desire Him and will crave His Word more and more.
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